It’s finally over — the Big dump has ended! A thousand and one useless items I’ve been hoarding for 30 some years got picked up and hauled away. I feel exhausted but relieved like I just ran a 5-mile marathon and can’t take another step until I stop and rest.
I’ve been trying to get rid of this stuff, selling some at yard sale where all of six people showed and four of ’em bought one thing each. Then I paid out $30 for three tables at a thrift market and made $50 after putting in seven hours of work (driving time included). In addition, I’ve given away hundreds of angel figurines, a cello and three printers — two of which still work but need a little attention and ink.
I also contributed my wife’s sewing machine and a sewing table I put together for her, but was never used after she suffered a traumatic brain injury in 2006 and things never really improved until I was forced to place her in a nursing home when she fell and struck her head again two years ago.
A crew I hired from a firm specializing in hoarding removal needed four days to clear away the stuff from my three-story house. The worst was in the cellar, where I herded hundreds of Xmas items I collected and stopped decorating with some seven years ago. Despite that, I continued to buy Xmas stuff and Halloween goodies for my son born in 1992. Why? Because Target offered them for sale at 90 percent off. Ninety percent off, for Christ-sake! Hoarders just can’t pass that up. It’s like an alcoholic who can’t pass up that one drink that always leads to another.
I used the third floor front bedroom for my kid’s toys and all the Halloween stuff. He stuffed things from the spare into that room, making it worse than a Vietnamese jungle at the time of the Tet Offensive. It was that bad!
And so was my addiction.
I admit. I’m a junkie. I collected stuff that ended up junk. I grew attached to ’em and believed, honestly believed that I’d use them someday. But that day never came.
But, it all ended yesterday. The clean-up process never seemed to end day-after-long-day as I refused to look at the items being hauled off and thrown into a truck to be scrutinized for what was salvageable and what’s totally useless. Goodbye Star Wars games and figures. So long X-mas wrapping and stupid-looking framed pictures that no one really liked but were kept for some reason.
It’s over. Now all I got to do is get someone or a group of some ones from Merry Maids to sweep, vacuum and dust over the next several weeks to make the house livable again.
I’ll never go to a yard sale or thrift store as long as I live, so help me George Carlin and all the “stuff” he swore upon.