(Don’t Try This At Home, Kids)
A contact lens done me in. Tried to insert one in each eye while driving behind schedule to get to a meeting Saturday morning.
Yeah, your read that right. Guilty of “lensing” while “driving,” a hazard of our multi-tasking world.
It worked pretty good the first time. And if it wasn’t for me having to slow down at entering the “city” limits, I might have made it with no harm done.
I rolled into the Borough of Ambler, just outside of Philadelphia, and was “controlling” the steering wheel with my left leg.You know, I hoisted my knee cap to the wheel, and leaned over as I held my right eye open with my left hand and inserted a lens on the eye.
But with partial vision, I could now see a cop car just three vehicles ahead of me. Uh, oh. Did the cop see my “daring-do,” which some may call reckless? I slowed, and focused more on my driving.
Oh no! Look at the time. I’ll never make it without being late.Thank God the cop is turning, Now I can speed up. And get to the other lens. Don’t want to take time to put the lens in after parking; just want to hit the lot running into the building where I plan to “slow down” with EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). Can you beat that? Rushing to get someplace so you can calm down. And you find yourself racing like a bat out of hell . . .
Well, here goes nothing. Lens, get thee onto my eye. Oh crap. I dropped it. Can’t look down. Still driving. Wait a minute. It didn’t fall. It’s on the side of my face. I see it in the mirror behind the sun visor. Now I got it. Just have to manuever it on the index finger and gently place it in.
Brake, “hit the brake,” my mind shouts and reflexes kick in. That’s it. No more lens “crafting” while driving. Almost there. There’s the Resiliency Center. Pulling in. Parking. Get the lens. Insert it.
It Drops. This drop’s for sure. No time to search for it on the car’s messy carpet floor. Will have to wing it with just one lens.
I won’t tell you how I got through two separate meetings with some 25 people, most of whom I had met for the first time, trying to take in their features with just one good eye. I had never related so well to the more severely visually impaired as I did then.
Later, I found my lens in the car, where temperatures hovered around the mid-20s. The lens had curled up. The liquid on the surface, however, had not dried. It froze the contact lens! I could not get it thawed despite efforts to warm it in my hands, under an armpit, and even sloshing around in my mouth.
It thawed eventually. Put it on the eye. Something happened, and I have not “seen” right since. A black blur appears at the bottom, virtually obstructing all vision from my left eye . It’s been four days with no improvement and I hope to “see” an eye doctor today, Don’t know if I scratched the eye with the “frost-bite” lens, or put too much strain on the one while focusing with the other.
I know one thing though. I won’t drive and try to insert a lens again. The wisdom I’ve gained from this journey will definitely see to it.
And now, for the rest of the story: