My heart opens more with a warm cup of coffee in my left hand than my right.
You got that?
Coming in from the cold, I savored the sips of the warm liquid first touching my lips and tongue as the coffee — “straight up,” with no sugar or cream — entered my mouth and slowly seeped inside of me. Ah! What a comfort. Nothing quite like it. It really does “hit the spot,” whatever the spot is.
I hold the paper cup in my hands. Well, actually, my left hand covers most of the cup. It’s colder than the right hand. I feel the chill as if noticing the feeling in that hand for the first time. It turned “frigid-like” while walking from the lot where I parked, to the IKEA building here in Conshohocken, PA today. The heat now “melds” with my hand, immediately dissipating the cold. I feel warmth start to spread. First from the cup and then to the inside of my hand.
Tracing the warmth, it travels to the forearm and then the upper arm, culminating with my entire left side. The warm “feeling” penetrates through to the pain from pressure on the sciatic nerve. It comforts that area from my lower lumbar to the left cheek of the buttocks.
God, so much warmth! Feels like a caress soothing me, soothing that physical irritation in the part of me that’s endured pain for so many years. Is it the coffee that is causing such a wonderful feeling, or is it coming from a heart that seems to pump healings to where a body needs it most?
Now that I think of it, I actually do experience the heart beat, sending “smoothing” pulsations from my neck to the bottom of my feet. At least on the left side, and through my left foot. Oh, Sweet Jesus! What a miracle-like sensation this flood of warmth is providing me this very moment!
Now, let me try it with the other hand. Let me direct this flow to my right side. There. I grasp the cup with my right hand. I drop the left. And I wait. I initially feel the warmth. But the intensity’s different. It’s warm, but not “penetrating,” if you know what I mean.
Still waiting, I “open” my Self to this “mindfulness” experiment of “being present,” being in the moment. Come on, I say. Let’s go. Start the warming process. Hello . . . Anybody home? Any “warm” body home?
I feel heat in the palm of the right hand. But nothing more. No spreading anywhere. It’s almost as if I have no connection with the various parts along my right side, no ability to pick up the warmth as my left side had orchestrated just a moment before.
Coffee must have gotten cold, I start to believe. Yeah. That must be it. Let me switch back to the left hand. That’ll prove it.
Oh My God! It’s still hot. Here it flows again. That same warmth. Immediately. Straight through and encompassing the entire left side. What a feeling. What a discovery!
But what exactly have I discovered? That heat spreads more on my left than my right? And what significance does this make? Am I any different now from you or anyone else? Perhaps, more unusual?
Or more . . . alone?
No. My heart tells me that “love,” as much as anything else, is spreading the warmth. You see, the left side of my brain . . . the logical, the theoretical, the practical . . . simply needs it more than the right side. The right side is already perfected. It is the side that is part of, and connected to, you and to the entire universe, as well as to the seat of all spirituality, creativity and compassion.
And I can live with this explanation until, or unless, someone can offer me another.
Happy Holidays Michael!!!!
Right back at you, Debbie!
Enjoy the new decade, the new you.
Michael, is there a physical reason that you feel more on the left side than on the right? I ask because it sounds like some kind of paralysis, perhaps partial. Of course, that’s not my business, but I can’t help but be curious. By the way, I love your blog. I just happened upon it. Your posts (I’ve read a few of them) are so honest and so down-to-earth, not to mention very, very MINDFUL. It’s quite endearing. I’ll be back.
Who knows much about the back. I hope to try acupuncture on it. But the aging process is just one more reason for us to recognize the suffering in life and to seek a path to live with it.
Mindful is as mindful does. And your posts do likewise, from what I could see. Inspirational and very moving.
Thanks from this end.