It’s been six months since I entered the hospital and got transferred from one rehabilitation center to another, but I think I may have finally licked the worst of my ailments and am ready to join my old household. I still have trouble walking from one room to another, and I need assistance from someone walking behind me while climbing up the stairs.
Continue readingCategory Archives: Vietnam veterans
Honor Flight to War Memorials Scheduled
I will be off to Washington DC next month on an excursion strictly for veterans to participate in what has been designated as an “Honor Flight” for those who served in World War II, the Korean War, and the Vietnam War.
Trip to Our Nation’s Capital will be Honorable
The program was created some years ago and even provided airfare for those living on the West Coast and living too far to make a trip to the nation’s capital by vehicle. That is where it got its name “Honor Flight” and in my bailiwick, that would be “Honor Flight Philadelphia.”
We will check into our lift-off facility between 4 and 5 a.m. on May 17th and share donuts and coffee at the Upper Merion Township Middle School until we are driven to the bus departing from the City of Brotherly Love at 5:30 a.m. The first patriotic eye-opening event will occur at 9:30 a.m. as we are slated to witness the “Changing of the Guard” while visiting with the Tomb Guard.

Childhood Dreams Recalled for Iwo Jima Statue
Iwo Jima will come next and my heart and mind will be thrown back to my childhood when I dreamed of becoming a Marine due in large part to the war movies I had seen and my love of that photograph and the later monument built of the Marines raising the American flag at that Japanese island toward the end of World War II (Feb. 23, 1945).
The Air Force Drill Team will greet us next followed shortly afterward at the Navy Memorial and a bountiful lunch. (No C-rations will be offered to any of my GI friends known as “grunts“!)
The Korean War Memorial will then be shown to us shortly thereafter.
Will Visit the Vietnam War Memorial Again
Next, I will once again focus on the engraved names of my fallen comrades as we visit the Vietnam War Memorial where the two 200-foot-long sections of a granite wall contain the list of 58,281 U.S. service members who died in that war. The names are listed in chronological order by date of casualty.
I will once again cry when I see First Lieutenant Victor Lee Ellinger’s name inscribed near the date of November 23, 1970. We served together in the “C Company” of 12th Infantry, and 2nd Battalion of the 25th Infantry Division as unit commanders. The combat infantry platoon leader was killed by sniper fire.
Finally, we will visit the World War II Memorial at 2:30 p.m. and depart by bus from Washington a half hour later. At 6 p.m. we will be greeted by well-wishers at the Upper Merion Middle School where dinner and entertainment will be provided to those of us who served.
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An Honor Flight Philadelphia leaflet Says:
“This is our tribute to you for all the sacrifices you have endured so the rest of us can live free. Enjoy your “Tour of Honor” to your memorial and be treated with the honor you so richly deserve. It is going to be a long day but I assure you it will be a rewarding day filled with memories.)
VA – Uber is now free for disabled veterans
I was escorted from my home by a Uber driver for the first time in my life when I learned the Veterans Administration provides the service free for disabled veterans.
Continue reading‘My Social Security’ & all of your earnings
While getting together all taxable income documents for 2023 to file with the IRS, I came across something that is quite amazing. The Social Security System keeps a list of all earnings you ever made starting with the first time you ever worked.
Continue readingExcellent Treatment at Philly VA Hospital
I am about to get one of those RSV shots at the VA Hospital of Philadelphia to prevent any lung infection, and I wanted to share my enthusiasm for all the work the Veterans Administration has provided me with most of my adult life.
Continue readingGetting Credit for my Time Served in Philly
Courtroom Opponents Meeting Up Years Later
You never know when an action from your past may catch up to you and remind you of what you once did in your previous life.
Continue readingMy writing device driven home in a flash
Confederate names changed at Army bases
The name change has finally occurred, and I am happy to report that every US Army base where I was stationed has had its Confederate Army soldier’s name removed and replaced with more admirable names.
Continue readingBan Fox News lies from our military bases
Fox News should be curtailed on all military bases and facilities to prevent men and women in uniform to be lied to about stories and events shaping our nation, particularly the political world around us.
Continue readingAcupuncture Offered to Help Veterans
I’m getting Therapy once again for my Well-Being!
Physical therapy, that is. Although I could probably use a little for my mental well-being. (Just kidding.)
Continue readingVietnam War Peace Accord 50 years old!
This month marks the 50th anniversary of when the Vietnam War finally ended. A Peace Accord was reached on January 27, 1973, making way for the complete removal of all troops by March 29th of the same year.
Continue reading‘So It Goes’ for Kurt Vonnegut Jr, Anti-War Veteran Author, and also a Former POW
One of my all-time favorite authors – a veteran who was a POW and a staunch anti-war advocate – would have celebrated his 100th birthday this month.
Continue readingCommunity College creates career choices
(See Part I “My Delaware County Community College!”)
Before I ever went to a Community College, I had to make up several deficits in my learning. I had to take Remedial Math as well as Remedial English. I passed both and was then permitted to take regular classes which include journalism studies and just as important, the school’s extra-curricular activity of working on the college newspaper.
Framed for my Service in the Vietnam War
I’ve Been “Framed.”
And the person who framed me was none other than my son, Nicholas.
He framed all my medals from my enlistment in the US Army more than 50 years ago, including my service in the Vietnam War.
Continue readingA photo gift for a GI & a swimsuit recovery!
What do a missing swimsuit and a 50-year-old photo of a newly-minted lieutenant have in common?
Continue readingA Brewerytown Kid Grows Up – Reviewed!
Veterans Day Tribute from Conshohocken!
I have been honored this Veterans Day through a recorded interview about my book on the Vietnam War for a program called “Good Morning Conshy,” where I share the broadcast with two companion pet managers for what is known as PACT. Many of the animals had assisted veterans who could no longer care for their pets and needed help for animals they viewed as their children.
Continue readingVietnam War Book Review a 4-Stars Rate!
Please Read and Enjoy This Review of My Book
authored by Michael J Contos
at Contoveros.wordpress.com
Continue readingMy Vietnam War Book is finally Published!
It took me more than 50 years, but I finally published my Vietnam War story and the toll it took on me after leading a combat infantry platoon when I was just a 21-year-old first lieutenant in the US Army.
Continue readingVFW opens me to a local veterans retreat
Well, I Joined the VFW.
That is, the Veterans of Foreign Wars. I could’ve joined it right out of the Vietnam War, but at that time of my life, I didn’t want to help support the war that I had just left.
Continue readingUSAA: Stop Tucker Carlson Ads to Vets
I complained to USAA, the American Veterans Car Insurance Company, when I learned that it was advertising on the Tucker Carlson show. As a subscriber of USAA for more than 50 years, I threatened to seek insurance elsewhere after the Fox News host called the Joint Chiefs of Staff general “stupid” and followed that up by describing him as a “pig.”
Continue readingCondemn Veterans who Attacked Capitol
Any veteran who took part in the January 6th Insurrection at the US Capitol should be stripped of his or her VA benefits and labeled a “traitor.”
Twenty Percent of Capitol Criminals were Veterans
There is a disturbing number of current and former military personnel identified among those who broke into the Capitol to overturn the election. About 20 percent of the nearly 300 arrested, according to NPR. They should no longer receive treatment at VA hospitals, get the GI Bill for attending school, or obtain a mortgage loan.
They have acted against the United States by taking part in a rebellion and should be viewed as turncoats who have betrayed their country and the Constitution that all of us veterans vowed to protect and follow upon our enlistment.
Congressman Ruben Gallegos, a Marine Corps veteran, has contacted the head of the VA, as well as Homeland Security and Attorney General Merrick Garland, to seek action against the veterans who betrayed our country. The Democratic congressman from Arizona, who is a member of the House Armed Services Committee, has suggested that all forego disability compensation, educational benefits, access to health care, employment opportunities, and access to veteran-affiliated state programs.
Charging Into the Capitol a ‘Subversive Activity’
The US Code governs benefits for veterans and their dependents. Under Sections 6104 and 6105, veterans and other individuals receiving VA benefits who commit mutiny or treason or who are convicted of ‘subversive activities,’ as listed in Section 6105(b), forfeit their right to VA benefits.”

Publish the Names of Subversive Veterans in Newspapers
I would go further and suggest the government publish the names of the traitors in the newspapers and identify them on television and the radio. Contact their bosses where they work and the churches their families attend, decrying them as traitors and deserters of the worst order.
Remember that five people were killed in the attack. One was a police officer.
No veteran should have taken part in such a heinous action, let alone follow the instructions of a draft-dodging coward.
Some creep hacked into my ‘Internet ID’!
I Got Hacked.
Again!
Some sombitch broke into my Internet connection and must have sent dozens of messages to who knows how many people I have gotten to know through Facebook and possibly Messenger.
Continue readingSoldiers I knew were no ‘Losers’ Mr. Trump
First Lieutenant Victor Lee Ellinger was no ‘loser’, Mister Trump.
He was shot and killed by an enemy sniper during the Vietnam War, and I forced marched my platoon to come to his aid, only to find out we got to him too late to help.
Continue readingChange Confederate generals’ names now
- As a veteran of several military bases, I would vote to change the names of all the facilities named for generals who fought for the Confederate army during our nation’s Civil War. I offer such action with a heavy heart because of the link I still have with the facilities that helped to create the soldier I had become, and the lessons learned in the US Army.  Continue reading
Vietnam veteran recalls war 50 years ago
Today is Vietnam Veterans Day, and the Year 2020 marks the 50th anniversary of my deployment in the war zone.
Leading a Combat Infantry Platoon at Age 21
I was a 21-year-old Second Lieutenant placed in charge of a platoon of some 25 men, many of them still in their teenage years and drafted like I had been.
I got promoted while in the field, and I remember using a black pen to darken the so-called yellow “butter bars” of the 2nd Lt. and make them a shade of subdued OD silver, the color for a 1st Lt.
- I didn’t know it then, but there was an urban legend that posed the question: “What was the life span of a 2nd Lt. landing in a hot LZ (helicopter landing zone)?”
The Answer: “Sixteen Minutes“
The first person killed when I was “In-Country” was 1st Lt. Victor Lee Ellinger, who was shot by a sniper while leading the Third Platoon. Two members of our Second Platoon died when they placed a claymore mine along a path and forgot where they tied the wire, walking into it and blowing themselves up.
No one was killed under my command, but five grunts were wounded when mortar fire exploded on us one day. I view that as the worst day of my life during that “Crazy Asian War.”
Dropped by a Helicopter to Hump the Boonies

We would be dropped by helicopter in an LZ and “hump the boonies” for 14 days in a row. In addition to experiencing firefights, we also marched through swampy areas, getting leeches that stuck to our bodies, needing to be burned off. I never parachuted into the triple canopy jungles of Vietnam, although I went to “jump school“, earning my Paratrooper Wings at Ft Benning, GA. I also learned how to repel, sleep in the rain, and avoid scorpions while training at Jungle School in Panama.
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I never shaved or used deodorant while in the field. Many of us stopped wearing underwear because the cloth took so long to dry when it had rained. We didn’t want to get crotch rot while on a search and destroy mission.
The coronavirus reminds me a little of what it was like 50 years ago. We never knew who the next one shot might be or be wounded from a hidden landmine or booby traps. Like today, our government really didn’t know what the hell it was doing. And we also had to abide by social distancing while moving.
Officer’s Own Men ‘Fragged’ Him with a Hand Grenade
I remember when a lieutenant colonel whom I loathed chastised me for failing to ensure my men kept a proper distance while moving from one place to another. The Third Platoon leader was shot, and I was ordered to go to his assistance. I force-marched my troops mercilessly in hopes of getting to Vic. But we were too late. He died, and two of my men had to be medevac’d out of the jungle because of heat exhaustion.
But what did Lt. Col Sallucci do? He was the only commander I knew whose own men tried to “frag” him by tossing a hand grenade at his sleeping quarters.) The SOB had flown in a helicopter above our marching lanes and chewed me out later for having let my men walk too close to one another. A hand grenade could take out more than one person, he said. Talk about the need for social distancing!
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Yes, times can be tough when you don’t know what tomorrow might bring in a possible world of pestilence, war, famine, and death.
But we combat veterans can take solace that whatever life throws at us back here in the civilian world, we can always say, “At least no one is shooting at me!”
No ‘Pardon’ for any War Crime Criminals
I was so proud of the Secretary of the Navy for his resignation in protest of a hideous act to cover up the atrocities of those in the military charged with war crimes.  Continue reading
An Officer and a Gentleman Recalled
I was commissioned as a Second Lieutenant 50 years ago, and looking back, I see it as one of the greatest achievements of my life. Also, one of the luckiest ones, and I’m so glad to still be around to talk about it.
GI Bill to celebrate its 75th anniversary!
I would not have gone to college had it not been for the GI Bill, which is marking its 75th anniversary on June 22, 2019.
Confession of a US Army dog-tag deserter
- I confess. I disobeyed orders when I marched into combat as a young man and I want to finally get it off my chest after all these years.  Continue reading
‘Welcome Home’ this Veterans Day 2018
- One hundred years ago, peace-loving people throughout the world commemorated the “War to End All Wars” by institutionalizing a holiday that morphed into Veterans Day in America.
World War I, as historians have named it, did not end all of the wars, and in 20 years, the nations of the earth faced the worst world war mankind has ever known.  Continue reading
August 22 — we’ll never forget Patty Ward
Patty Ward, a Specialist 4 with a helicopter gunship, was shot down 50 years ago while flying to the aid of US Army soldiers during the Vietnam War. He was one of four men who died when their helicopter was hit and crashed.
Patty was awarded the Silver Star for bravery in connection with helping to rescue other grunts wounded in another battle. His family in the Fairmount section of Philadelphia received the medal posthumously.  Continue reading
Memorial Day cries out for those who died
Memorial Day always brings back memories of the Vietnam War and one of the soldiers I served with who I called a friend and a true “comrade-in-arms.” He was Victor Lee Ellinger, a fellow who lived in Staunton, VA. He was shot and killed by an enemy sniper while leading a platoon some 50 miles outside of Saigon. Continue reading
Big Lebowski highlights veterans’ PTSD
The best example of PTSD ever portrayed in a movie was offered by John Goodman in “The Big Lebowski” when the character, a Vietnam veteran, pulls a gun on a fellow bowler and threatens to shoot him for crossing a line and attempting to enter a score in a book.  Continue reading
Overcoming fear in the wild blue yonder!
It struck me as I slowly made my way from the floor of the plane and stood in the center of the walkway. There were at least 30 other soldiers on the C-140, a military aircraft that was flying over the field where those of us in jump school would soon be taking our first jump.  Continue reading
Grateful for Choosing the Veteran’s Way
I didn’t want to go to Vietnam to fight for our country. Who did back in 1968? I was never a gung-ho type of guy, even though I’d go a little berserk when a buddy of mine got attacked by some bully at home or in school.  Continue reading
Big Moose bar helps wayward boys to grow
My mother hit me upside the head when she caught me drinking beer in the Big Moose Bar up the street from where we lived.
I was 16 years old at the time and sipping a Ballantine beer with a friend from Dobbins Technical High School. Someone must have ratted me out, as my good friend Joe Walsh and I — both young white guys — drank in the African American bar in a section of Philadelphia called Brewerytown. Continue reading
‘Garrulous Greek’ recalls Journalism Gift
I display the pewter plaque prominently at my front door so that anyone leaving my house can see what has meant to me more than any awards I hang in my Feng Shui home. Continue reading
My Memorial Day recall — Third of June
“It was the Third of June, Another Sleepy . . . Day . . .”
With that phrase starting one of most memorable country songs in the 196os, I began my life as a man, a soldier, and a leader of an infantry platoon in the Vietnam War.  Continue reading
Those seeking help for PTSD war wounds are not all that weak, my dear Mr. Trump!
Dear Mr. Trump,
I never felt “weak” when I started feeling the rage that grew in me from Post-Traumatic Stress following 25 years after leading an infantry platoon in the Vietnam War. Continue reading
Shooting political signs never the answer
I wanted to shoot the political sign I saw outside of Philadelphia the other day but ended up feeling sorry for all of us who react violently against the person we demonize on the other side of the aisle. Continue reading
Play as if your life depends on it – It does!
Playing is something I do quite well, if I do say so myself. I enjoyed it ever since I was a kid and don’t see how I could truly enjoy my life if I didn’t incorporate some sort of play in my daily living.  Continue reading
Wounds of Love Still Hurt this Soldier Boy
I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.
Peggy’s mother, Mary, answered and said “Hello, Michael.” She didn’t invite me in, but smiled, and I kind of smiled back.  Continue reading
Emergency hits home; order soon restored
My second wife stopped breathing shortly after they placed her in the emergency vehicle.
‘Love & Rockets’ explode near this veteran
My son, Nicholas, just didn’t seem to understand how much pain I suffered in Sutcliffe Park when I took him to see fireworks on clear and starry night sky on the Fourth of July some years ago.
A spiritual path with a dark & stormy night
Dark Night of the Soul.”
I have no idea what Saint John of the Cross meant when writing about his spiritual struggles several centuries ago, but I feel as if I’ve been going through one all day today. 
Just now I threatened to punch my roommate in the face after I felt humiliated by him when he not only told me to take off my stinky socks, but he demanded I wash them – and my damn feet – before returning to the room where we just arrived following a two-hour trip in a van.
Anger Arises Quickly and Needs Quick Abatement
Had he said one more word about my feet, I would have swung at his big Irish head, caring not one lick about the consequences. To hell with any spiritual pilgrimage. To hell with finding answers to this life and any other god-forsaken one!

Emotions run high in darkness, but clear light will always prevail
I felt out of sorts earlier in the day and had confided in the minister for six of us making up the Philadelphia contingent for the Centennial Celebration for WON Buddhism. She noticed I was down and advised me that another person I had some friction with would need to work out the problems they had themselves.
I felt uplifted and meditated on a park bench outside of a magnificent soccer stadium where more than 50,000 people would squeeze into the facility and get an inspirational sermon from the dharma master, only the fifth one in the line of major spiritual dharma leaders since WON Buddhism was started on April 28, 1916.
Ate Like a True Native of South Korea
I ate like a Native Korean, stuffing myself with delicious rice and beans, tender fish, and a hearty portion of beef. I didn’t mind the vegetables that came with every meal, including breakfast. (I don’t know of anyone in America who has ever had to eat vegetables for breakfast. I’d call that un-American.) But I heartily ate what tasted like little pancakes, which I knew had green and red things mixed in because it was good for you!
————–
I resonated with much of what the Prime Dharma Master Kyongsan said, particularly about reincarnation and how we as a society have made the elevation of “matter” — what I believe he meant as science and technology — more important than our spiritual lives.
“With this Great Opening of Matter
Let there be a Great Opening of Spirit.”
– Founding Master Sotaesan
This is the “founding motive” of Won Buddhism’s teaching, this holy man said. And it made a lot of sense in 1916 when telephone lines were being introduced into Korea (for the royal family) and tracks for the coming of the railroads were laid in what was still a united country. Little, if any, emphasis was given to the moral compass of the nation or to the human spirit of the entire world, for that matter.
Hence, the creation of a “spiritual power” that could conquer the material power that has (in my words) “run amok.”
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I wanted to dwell in the spaciousness of what I had just heard from this holy man of whom I met earlier this week, genuflected in front of, and bestowed a kiss on his hand before he realized some crazy American had fallen in love with his very presence.
I wanted desperately to talk about it with others moved by such an eloquent understanding and discourse on the human condition that the latest dharma master said was barely surviving today in the “emergency room.”
Had to Leave Without Further Spiritual Discussions
But I had to rush out and get into a van and travel dozens of miles with no discussion or debate of what my heart had just exposed me to, and longing to open more for. I felt deflated following such an exuberant outing. I felt unfulfilled. I felt alone.
When my roommate brought up my stinky socks, I took them to the bathroom and washed them — and my feet. But when he said more when I came back, he was lucky I didn’t hit him with every negative feeling this post-traumatic stressed-out veteran with a near-blinding red rage was having trouble keeping boiled up inside.
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Where had my peace of mind gone? Where was the love? What kind of monster switches from such a loving and understanding person, to one who wants to do bodily harm to another spiritual seeker, and care not what wounds he might receive in return?
If that’s not a “Dark Night of the Soul” on a spiritual path, then I don’t know what you would call it. I’m glad I didn’t swing. I’m happy for both our sakes that I left the room with a lot of cursing on my part but no physical contact.
Escaping Trauma Through Dilligent Writings
Calmness has returned. Getting away from the stressful situation is the first thing psychologists tell those of us with PTSD to do.
Writing about it also helps. It is as therapeutic as meditation can be.
I just hope someone seeking a spiritual path like the one I’m on doesn’t get turned off by this public Internet confession.
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(Note. My roommate and I just made up before midnight, and I’ll be returning to the room with less smelly feet and a heart that is on the mend. His too!
That is, his heart and not his feet.)
PTSD undergoes a Shamanistic treatment
The Shaman applied pressure with his fingers and thumbs to the side, back, and front of my skull. He told me to let him know if he caused me any pain.
The Ice Man Cometh for Me and for Thee
It was the ice on the truck that beckoned to me when I was six years old and playing on the one-way street near my home in North Philadelphia. Continue reading
‘Post-Traumatic Growth’ can help you heal
I experienced something scientists have labeled “Post-Traumatic Growth” twice in my life and some forty years apart. Both led to major changes in my life and a new look at life like I never had imagined it to be.  Continue reading
Owning the Mental Illness Amongst Us
Mental illness scares the shit out of me. The very term conjures up images of some crazed guy with wild, straggly hair and a demon-like smile of malevolence. Steven King kind of comes to mind when I think of someone who might be a little touched in the head. A Stephen King character, that is. Not Stephen King.  Continue reading
Meditation reflections help heal the worst
Reflections opened a new world of understanding today. Years after a traumatic event, I can look back and see things in a totally different and healing fashion.
What I Believe Makes Me Who I Am
Who am I? What do I believe? And can I name a few of my beliefs?
My ‘Vietnam War Recall’ starts tomorrow
“I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, more vengeance, and more desolation. Some of these young men think that war is all glory but let me say . . . ”War is All Hell!”
-
American Civil War General William Tecumseh Sherman
Recalling love in a 30-yr-old 1-night stand
You wanted more, and I couldn’t give it to you. I was seeking love, romance, and someone I could be committed to. You simply saw me as a “one-night stand.” Someone you enjoyed being with for an hour, a night, or just one day in the life of two ships like us meeting briefly on a night at sea.  Continue reading
Songs offered hope to Vietnam War grunts
Musical refrains from Rock & Roll songs helped get me through the Vietnam War. I didn’t know all the lyrics of the songs, only those short parts where I’d stop what I was doing and raise my voice in unison with the lead singer. 
Recalling some cool summers in the Army
Summer always served as a “new beginning” for me when I was in the US Army. I got drafted on the Third of June and did my basic training in the hot, dry air of Fort Bragg, North Carolina.
I can’t tell you how many push-ups I did during the two-month training session, as the meanest drill sergeant I ever saw brought fire to my poor soul by running me everywhere and cussing me out to force me into fighting shape.
A rant against disrespect, hurt & the war
Much of what I know about War was what I learned while playing as a kid. You know, using a stick or a broken branch from a tree, I’d pretend it was a rifle to shoot the bad guys who were out to get me and the rest of the good guys in my old neighborhood. 
Defense Attorney Regrets His Prosecution
All of my legal career involved defending someone charged with crimes or offenses against the law. I worked 20 years as a lawyer, trying more than a hundred jury trials, winning more than half of them.
But to be honest, my first taste of arguing the law came not as a defense lawyer, but as a prosecutor, one appointed by some colonel to bring charges against a buck private who broke a law and faced a summary offense for some minor infraction.
Cause of All Wars Questioned in Confederate Flag Controversy
President Barack Obama may have raised an issue on all wars when he eulogized a fallen comrade on June 26, 2015, at the funeral for the pastor of the AME Church in Charleston, South Carolina.
While never detracting from the valor that Confederate Soldiers fought with in the Civil War, he offered a plain and simple truth.
Continue readingTrue Love Passed Over for a Child’s Sake
Peggy sat at the table of the Blue Jay Restaurant, staring out the window and wondering where her life had gone and what she should do with her new condition. 
She had hoped that the signs she felt from her body were false and that she was simply sick. But she knew from what happened to her older sister that there was no getting around the truth.
Sniper triggers nothing but bad memories
I never saw a sniper as a hero. I don’t think many Americans did either. That is, until someone made a movie about one of them that fought for “our side.” Continue reading
It was me an enemy sniper was trying to kill
A Sniper Takes Aim at this Young Lieutenant
A Viet Cong sniper was trying to kill me. Some motherfucker hiding in the trees, the bushes, the triple-canopy jungle had just shot at my platoon. I thought he was shooting randomly, despite the debris from the ground, grassland and other tiny bits of rock that struck me from a bullet’s ricochets.
Ithaca Mystical Insights — by Contoveros
Trying to Understand the Meaning of Life
I am looking for the type of cover for my latest book, my son. It tells of a Mystical Journey I embarked upon several months ago, arriving in Ithaca, New York, for a three-day retreat. There, I met a teacher who explained how I could understand my life and its meaning.
- He spoke no English, yet conveyed to me the Wisdom of the Ages.
As stress keeps arising, meditation caps it
Someday I may just get my stress under control.
And like Buddy Holly once said: “That’ll be the day . . . that I die.”
At least, no one is shooting at me this time
(See Part One, “Cancer strikes . . .)
Fear of Dying From Cancer Takes Over Me
The train ride from home to the hospital was one of the longest trips of my life. I just knew I was going to die. I figured that the surgeon could not remove all the cancer during my operation 10 days earlier, and it finally struck me: I am a cancer victim!
New bucket list headed by state of Alaska
North to Alaska!
That’s where I’m headed next week, and I’ll start checking off the newest box of my “bucket list,” the list of things I want to do before I “kick the bucket.” Continue reading
Ithaca Insights Serve Up Peace & Calm
How May I Serve You?
That’s the key to a happy life, you know. Learning to serve others selflessly with no expectation of a reward other than the knowledge you are doing unto others something you’d want them to do . . . unto everyone else.
Hoping for a lofty goal, I write a lot & often
(Question 2 on Hope)
You may also have experienced this kind of hope, (See https://contoveros.wordpress.com/?p=12505&preview=true) but not thought of it in those terms. Think of a time when you felt sure you were going to attain a lofty goal, even though the path to the goal was not apparent. That is the hope that comes from your being. Describe this feeling of certainty in your journal. – Deepak Chopra 21-Day Meditation Experience (Feeling Hope) I was a buck private in training as a soldier in Fort Dix, NJ, when I had a vision, or what Zen Buddhists call a “satori” or moment of clarity of what I needed to do with my life.
Hope to One Day Write a Book
I was a buck private in training as a soldier in Fort Dix, NJ, when I had a vision, or what Zen Buddhists call a “satori” or moment of clarity of what I needed to do with my life.
I needed and wanted to write a book.
Explosion shatters Peace but calm prevails
Question 2 of 4 on ” Feeling Peaceful“
Thinking of this same peaceful experience, imagine that feeling of calm becoming deeper and stronger within your soul to the point where nothing happening in the environment could shake it. Describe what that kind of peace would feel like physically, mentally and emotionally. How could this type of peace change your life? — Deepak Chopra 21-Day Meditation Experience (Day 3 — “Feeling Peace”)
Well, it would be hard to imagine my Peace in Vietnam being any better than what it was that day. It could have very easily been shattered by gunfire. Worse yet, the peace could have been destroyed with my heart and my soul wounded by something called friendly fire.
Peace Found Deep Inside the Vietnam War
(Part 1 of 2)
Recall a time when you felt calm and peaceful, even though the circumstances were not peaceful. Write down a description of that event, and describe how you were able to be calm in that situation. What was the source of this peacefulness if it didn’t come from outside? — Deepak Chopra 21-Day Meditation Experience (Day 3 — “Feeling Peace”)
I had led my platoon in Vietnam for several months. We had encountered several firefights, but no one was killed or injured, thank God. But you never knew what the next day would bring, and so we were on edge, on the ready, so to speak, for anything that might have endangered us. Continue reading
Breathing to ‘Right Self’ is a Lifetime Job
Don’t think my friend, Lea Stoneheart, expected such angst from me while responding to her comment about “The Hidden Costs of War” Retreat at Omega Institute five days last week [April 22, 2010]. It just spewed out. I guess I’m still processing much of what occurred. It will take time to learn to use tools to seek peace without first having to go to war.
Continue readingTruly Living May Just Be Worth Dying For
The thought of going to prison never bothered me. I’d survive and flourish behind bars, where I’d have more than enough time to reflect and write which I have found is my true love in life.
No, I could kill without worrying about the consequences. It would be my first offense. I am certified as a Vietnam veteran with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and I don’t see any judge or jury putting me to death for the crime.
Vietnam War veteran recalls his journey
Dealing with the Vietnam War becomes a little easier each time I write about it. I “desensitize” myself. I now see my actions as separate from the emotions I felt while a young soldier, as well as the feelings of guilt many veterans like me, imposed on ourselves while readjusting to civilian life. It’s helpful when a high school student asks questions and you try to be honest and direct.
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Where is the boy I left home for the war?
Pinned for a Life above & beyond the call
OCS Opens me to a Life-Long Journey of Achievements
While Neil Armstrong was taking a giant leap for all mankind, I had taken a small step toward adulthood one month after the moon landing, and I had no one to thank for it except my brother, who encouraged me to aim for the stars in becoming an Officer and a Gentleman in the Army of the United States of America.
Tattoo Tests Tale to Tell the Truth Today
A tattoo can readily identify someone, and sometimes one can become the key to the guilt or innocence of a man facing the wrath of a woman he may have wronged.
Omega opens doors to lost PTSD veterans
I didn’t want to go back to Omega Institute this year. Each time I travelled to this land of Sleepy Hollow and Rip Van Winkle, I’d get high from the holistic experience. But then I’d change into an Ichabod Crane feeling chased by the Headless Horseman, who’d tell true-life stories that caused so much pain I couldn’t hold it inside. Continue reading
Keeping all Alive a ‘Lifetime Achievement’
After serving in the Vietnam War, I turned my back on anything having to do with the military, and so I was totally surprised years later when, requesting my medals, I got one that I still don’t believe I earned.  Continue reading
Need no battle to understand war horrors
When I heard the song “Still in Saigon” the other day, I could have sworn a Vietnam veteran had written about his flashbacks and a need to process what was unprocessed as a young man.
Non-Veterans Can Understand War Tragedies Too
Little did I know that the writer never set foot in Southeast Asia, let alone serve in the military. That got me wondering about the performing arts and how someone who never experienced war could capture its long-term effects on those who faced combat.  Continue reading
Exercise Gets Me Higher, Step by Step
I get such a high while exercising that I can’t imagine why I haven’t done this more often in life.  Continue reading
Seeing a Veteran’s’ History Never Repeats
Do all of us & yourself a favor.
Keep an eye out for a Veteran.
Actively seek out someone in your church, synagogue or temple and befriend him so that what happened in Philadelphia last week never happens again.  Continue reading
No where to go but ‘up’ after looking down
The damn branch broke my concentration. I had not planned for an overhanging tree limb to block the pathway, walking three-quarters of a mile from my home to the train station, with my head facing my feet the entire time.
Resolve to Stop Anger from Feeding on Me
Anger.
It hits like a poison arrow causing me to drop what I’m doing and focus on the pain it inflicts.
Reaching Higher In Women’s Company
I Love Women.
I’ll take them in all shapes and sizes, the old and the young, the rich and the poor.
If it wasn’t for women, I — and a lot of guys I know — wouldn’t even be here! Continue reading
Open my Vessel for ALL Lights to Shine
Thank God for Buddhism.
What’s that you say?
I can’t have one in, and of, the other?
Are you telling this red-blooded American veteran that I cannot follow the teachings of the Buddha and still believe in the God of Abraham? Continue reading
Remembering Warriors of all of our Ages
“Warriors have been rewarded for their service or their families have been provided support, since the beginning of organized society. From the veterans of Egypt in the third millennium B.C. through the Crusaders of medieval Europe, to veterans of today, governments have compensated their military personnel or their survivors, for loss of life, wounds, injuries, or length of service in defense of the state. Continue reading
War is never the answer today (11-11-11)
On this Veterans Day, 11-11-11, what would you tell yourself if you could go back in time and greet that young man recently returned home from the war?
War is never the answer,
But only a failure on all
Sides to reach an answer. Continue reading
A noble banker needs to occupy here
Is there a noble banker in the world? Only someone in the lending business who sees his calling as a “service for the people,” I believe, could correct past abuses and recommend changes for, and in the best interests of, us “99 percenters.”
These are the True Signs of Our Times!
When I read the Occupy Wall Street demonstrators were unfocused and without a coherent message, I took a closer look at them in Philadelphia, and discovered some were disheveled street persons looking for handouts, and one was a graduate school political science major spouting Marxist teaching.
They Represented Only One Percent.
The remaining 99 percent of the other protestors were mostly young, highly educated, unemployed or underemployed men and women who got tired of the debt-ceiling fiasco and took to the streets to mobilize against the Tea Party followers.  Continue reading
Choosing death so that others might live
Eight Tibetan Buddhist monks set themselves on fire to protest the Chinese occupation of their country. They took their own lives when soldiers of the army set up quarters in Tibetan monasteries.
How could anyone do such a thing?
They must have been in intense pain. Or they were offering overwhelming love.  Continue reading
End needless suffering in US debates
Tone it down, America. You are cutting off your nose to spite your face. The face of the body politic, that is, we are creating needless hurt for the countrymen we’d like to lead to our mutual goal: the pursuit of happiness.  Continue reading
You ask me: ‘WHY I AM A DEMOCRAT?’
Why am I a Democrat?
I was born this way.
No, that’s not right.
I was raised this way.
No, that’s not right either.
I chose to be a Democrat.  Continue reading
Acupuncture: ‘Dragon drives out Demon’
A Dragon entered me and drove away a Demon last night.
A student at the WON Institute performed acupuncture, penetrating into my psyche as well as my epidermis. More importantly, she opened her heart with such compassion I wept, feeling her healing spread throughout my body and soul.  Continue reading
Healthy disdain for $$$ really not healthy
Could never be a good businessman. Did not love money enough.
Never put wealth at the top of a “to do” list of things to achieve. Oh, I wanted to make a comfortable living and get a nest egg for the future. But I had no drive to accumulate big bucks.
You man a job right, job’ll right the man
Jobs have a way of defining us. We become “the job,” or rather grow into what we perceive to be the “ideal performer“ of that job. Whether we like it or not. The job. Or ourselves.  Continue reading
A taste of heaven offered here on earth
Pizza pie and a chocolate milkshake.
Each drew me like an oasis to a man walking alone in a desert.
Injustice should make us all ‘go berserk’
“Going Berserk” has always had a wicked appeal to me.
For brief moments, I’d go “mad,” and not care for my safety or well-being, but focus instead on the object causing a “crazy re-action” on my part. It was as if a volcano had erupted and I wanted to punish those perceived as evil-doers. Might have had a bit of “religious fervor” involved, as I saw myself correcting a wrong or an injustice with a quick upper-cut to the jaw.
Going AWOL helps a boy grow into a man
Went AWOL while a private in the US Army in 1968.
Continue readingCan Hell Actually Be Just ‘Other People?’
Felt disconnected from the World as I knew it yesterday.
A tough road makes journey a little easier
When my father spoke Greek with the disciplinarian of the Catholic High School where I played hooky at age 14, I thought I had it made.
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